Tag: Davey Dreamnation (page 11 of 25)

Fire services in the Camp Davey region were still on high alert last night, after a freak accident within the superstar’s secluded compound.

While details, as ever, remain sketchy, it appears that the local fire brigade’s resources were stretched to their very limits when Davey accidentally set himself on fire.

“I think he was trying to set the whole world ablaze with his incendiary new brand of d-rap,” said his close friend and collaborator, Stung this morning (Majorca time).

“But apparently he missed his target and only managed to light up his own flares.

“They’re in tatters now. Even the Crime Scene Investigation guys won’t go near them. Someone tells me they may contain asbestos.”

The music world has been buzzing in recent weeks with rumours that Dreamnation has switched styles and is now paying homage to hip-hop, a claim the artist himself rigorously denies.

“I deny that rigorously,” Stung said. “I’m seething that you’d even think of asking such a bewildering question – seething.”

A no-fly zone was enforced over the Camp Davey compound last night as preparations were made for Davey’s descent into his custom-built recording studio, where he will begin work on the follow-up to his sensational and blistering debut album, Islands In the Stream of Consciousness.

“I’m not sure what he’s thinking of calling it – as ever, people are pretty tight-lipped around here. But I suspect the new title may be quite similar to the last one – I’m betting on Islands In the Steam of Incendiary Showers,” stated the artist’s pet llama and confidante, Scaramouche. “But don’t quote me on that.”

Speaking on the condition of a rolling supply of neenish tarts, the plump animal refused to speculate on the style of music Davey will employ on the album.

“No, I prefer the chocolate ones. How would I know? I think he’ll try and sneak my theme song on there [“Scaramouche’s Theme”, featuring the llama himself on vocals] as a way of saying thanks for all the support I’ve given him over the past twelve months. I’m also looking forward to finally gaining my own web site. Davey tells me the boffins are working on it now.”

Camp Davey erupted this morning after it was learnt that the NME has apparently rejected a request from the troubled artist to stop the war in Iraq.

“Look, I don’t know who you are or what camp you belong to,” snapped a harried-sounding NME staffer via telephone from London, “but there’s a war going on, in case you hadn’t logged in. And frankly, such serious issues far out-weigh any concerns I might have about rejecting this so-called “rock star” and his pathetic – no, freak it: AMATEUR attempt at a live review. Of Massive Attack, for freak’s sake – Massive Attack. Davey Dreamnation doesn’t give a damn about the war in Iraq. Now, grow up.”

An official Davey Dreamnation press conference is being planned for tomorrow morning (Majorca time) but it is rumoured that no less than eight elder statesmen of 1980s rock and beyond will perform in support of Davey’s cause(s).

“That’s right,” bleated an obviously out-of-sorts Scaramouche this afternoon outside the entrance to his neatly-swept enclosure, “Sir Nik Kershaw, Sir Mark Knopfler, Sirs Tears For Fears and Sir Spandau Ballet will be in the escort party, but as for those in attendance this evening, that’ll cost you five jars of marmalade.”

Sources a little closer to Davey along the food chain suggest that Davey is in the midst of a protracted battle with his demons.

“It’s like my blue turtles,” mused Stung, just yards away from the scene of “one of the most amazing outbursts of personal invective I’ve ever heard. No – witnessed. No – not witnessed, endured. That’s it. I mean, the symptoms, the repercussions, the angst – I’ve seen it all before. It’s hell, no doubting that. But I came through it, and so can Davey.”

When asked to confirm whether Davey’s rumoured “incendiary” new single may in fact be a rap anthem, Stung (and the llama) scurried back inside the electrified Camp Davey compound, refusing to accept even one clinker.