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Category: Poems (page 12 of 73)
As of October 2011, I’d posted over three hundred poems on this site, including many sonnets and search poems, as well as numerous poems that didn’t make it into chapbooks such as Abendland and Morgenland. I then ceased posting poems here, choosing instead to distribute them via my poem of the week newsletter. Then I stopped doing that too. Every now and then I post a poem here … but not as often as I’d like.
you arrived in kochani life-bruised and hung-over lucky to have escaped the clutches of bureaucracy the festival of mute poets barely a memory (lines nothing compared to roadside fields of rice (flags the evening's cool remedy: couples walking beside a tiny river (readings in a childrens' park where swings & miniature trains reminded you of certain times when a swing was all you needed those times before words took over the ends of which found you projecting your voice into darkness just a single бакнеж your only weapon in a war where disarming complete strangers was your only aim two girls in nosija dress were happy to pose for a photo or two but were too short for you to put your arms around them even though that was all you wanted to do (to shield these two girls who could be your daughters from all that the night drunk on itself could have thrown at them | there on the stage under arc-lights right in front of the camera while you stood there waiting for a flash to go off you felt a small arm curl itself around the small of your back & in that instant you wanted to bawl & missed your imaginary daughter so much she was almost real (the way flags make real the grand but obscure desires of nations or even towns that want to be nations (lonely like lost swallows in the dead season their flightpaths like tracer bullets in the soft but lonely sky (so you bawled your words at the tidy darkness anyway kissed the invisible city with your lips wide open then turned your back on the figments of applause only to be offered a bottle of cola by the girl in the nosija dress whose cheeks were as rouge as ads for products that no longer existed (like the cola which was a local brand you clearly weren't meant to recognise but which tasted sweeter even than that childhood you never thought you'd ever miss
from siberia: the fisherman's cooling room is a cave chinked out of a cliff of ice - there the fish lie swollen while the nomads chop wood in the snow & while my foreign tongue gags on the names of lost cities & apartment buildings hazily appearing now through the window of my helicopter - as we circle the lights of nurry urengoy - hastily built sitting atop a field of natural gas - lots of it frozen within a red bottle by a stubbornly icy cork (thus read my - hmmm suspiciously poetic briefing crumpled grimly in my gravel-encrusted mitten) "so you see chuck" he breathed along the thousand mile cable connected to my alaskan telephone "this is the place where only the gallant survive - where there is no turning back so if the going gets rough - " gahhrrr! "moonlight and vodka takes me away" croons the one-time concert performer to an incomprehending audience of short time miners & oil riggers thawing in the bar what else is there to do the alcohol slides like penguins from glaciers down throats & karloff's tears flow in buckets while the men sway from side to side now and then grunting as they discover the faces behind the frozen beards they worked with on that damned oil pipeline the dream of a balalaika: slowly crushed beneath a timber truck o god i want to go home this place this place of deja vu it's riddled with shanty towns & factories & refineries & summer fun & dirt bikes & ballet & grizzly bears & snowy ideal resort frozen lakes & oil derricks & aeroplanes & national geographic photographers & helicopters & heads full of maps & jigsaw names & red faces & hangovers & a terrified memory of a young boy crucified on a bare flat table wrapped in chunks of ice so his body will cool & his pulse slow enabling the surgeon to get at his heart
This poem was first published in Typecast (1992).
let's pretend i'm an eagle: okay, now, here are my wings, and with them I shall launch myself from this obscure eyrie, and together with my fellows! [yea, comrade eagles!!] i will fly back to my own beaches, my own daylight savings time, to see the surf club at Ballina, to witness the sunset at Yamba, and then to sleep on the beach all night so as to catch the sunrise! W000t! and to ask myself, knowing well the answer: could Brunswick Heads ever be as miserable as olden Europe sometimes is (that is, on the days when it rains? [which means most days! LOL!] and then if the rhetorical answer is no, then it's all settled: i'll sit and watch that sun rising until it burns my scalp, until its death rays meet my bald crown in a victorious union, and i'll slip on a shirt, slop on sunscreen and slap on a hat; yes, even though i'm an eagle and have no need of such things, i'll pack them into a small dilly bag and attach it to my claw right before i launch myself from my faraway eyrie and - [hang on, didn't i just - ehm ...] oh i shall replay my grand ascent from my eyrie just for kicks! and then wait for myself on the briny shore of Lake Ainsworth, near Lennox Head there, where Kombie-van campers greet me with toothbrushes and grins, and the skirts of the young women have been sewn with stars. and why shall I re-do all of these things i have already done? why, to remind myself of the fact that here, in the cold north, i am surrounded by a cold and clammy dark that knows my name, a dark fog disguising itself as some kind of cool suede jacket; yea, because here the winter lasts for six months of the year, and the sea itself freezes and cracks and pops, then disappears, and the snow blows horizontally, and is generally a big nuisance. snow everywhere, even in cupboards, soccer balls and underwear - and inside my breasts reside many ice-cold and evil thoughts ... [right, so you're now a female eagle and - ] [SHUT IT.] and so this is why i cannot possibly stay here a moment longer - no, not even for a nano-second, with snow inside my underpants! let me pretend that i'm an eagle, as in this poem's first line, and let me simply, rhetorically and magnificently don my wings [as though i need to actually put them on] and fly non-stop, or perhaps with a brief stopover in Singapore - or maybe even Bangkok - no, make it Singapore, okay? as i said, non-stop to Coolangatta International Airport, where a shuttle bus shall await me, and I shall travel on, onwards to Stradbroke, or maybe just settle in a heap in Byron Bay. there dwell tourists who shall tend to my tired wings, who like to twirl fire sticks after dark on the beach, and who are generous with the makings when rolling those peculiarly patchouli cigarettes of theirs ... yes, and after the sun has gone down totally, and I look up to the wooded hillsides dotted with million dollar bungalows, i'll see the intense wisdom on nature's part of beckoning me there, where pizza crusts and empty chip packets proliferate in carparks and i can stuff myself silly on unsophisticated carbohydrates. [zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz ....] then, and only then, i'll rise once more (sure, a little clumsily) from my doona, paddle pop stick and hypercolour t-shirt eyrie, and fly a few clicks south to the shore of Lake Ainsworth, right by the old Department of Sport and Recreation camp there, and I'll park myself there for a millennium or so, and watch the ti-tree waters rippling in the breeze, or in the wake of some kid playing hide and seek with the sky. after all, beauty is beautiful where- ever you look for it or find it. so let me perch, undisturbed, in the branch of some otherwise unremarkable tree, preferably green; let the sun set slowly over the whole tableau like the light at the end of a movie, and let me die there, one day, cradling childhood in my arms.
I have seen things you do not wish to see, in any theatre, not even in war. Together we have seen & done what few could ever imagine, even inside these dream machines. The men emerging from cubicles with their dicks hanging limp & out. Or the couples fracking with impunity by the dance floor. I knocked the glass of Nazi liqueur from your hand just for kicks, & then ordered another round. O it felt good to slosh my boots in the sticky stuff, to the tune of that song about Barbara Streisand. Truly, we're lucky to be alive (these eye-popping times, when men & women of all ages flock from the outlying villages towards naval bases at night. The beggar’s wooden hand, washed clean by rain & piss. A mini-golf course, winking at us all with its eighteen darkened eyes. I hit you, a drunken man admitted. I hate you, I replied, only half- joking. We laughed but as he walked away he whispered bastard & I had to follow him to the cubicles - just to sit him down & finish him off. I have done things you would not wish to do, in any theatre, not even in war. And I have done them all in a Swedish sports bar to which you'll never be admitted, not even after we have gone. I have smashed myself upon the cool marble floor of Stars & Stripes but you'll never find a single shard of me there. Call me a foreigner, call me what you will - but touch me again & you fracking die.