Hello, my name is Scaramouche. Welcome to my world. My master Davey Dreamnation has set up this special blog for me, so that I can share with you my inner thoughts and meditations. I have often wished to express myself through words but as I cannot speak, I have felt very frustrated up until now. However I can sing, and this has been my saving grace. When I sing, my spirit soars. I must say that the special studio Davey has set up for me does make the whole thing a lot easier for me. Today he showed me how to use the special “Cher” button, which transforms my vocals into those of Cher. Technology is amazing, isn’t it? I hope you will enjoy my special home page. I will be trying to put as much stuff on here as I can. In the meantime, enjoy!
Tag: Scaramouche (page 4 of 4)
In an apparent attempt to rid himself of the controversy that has plagued him ever since he made the mistake of saying he enjoyed watching the US sitcom “Alf”, Davey Dreamnation has declared his former best friend and interpreter “dead” in an official Camp Davey ceremony.
“Well, the fact is that he’s sick of this whole Scaramouche thing. If you want to know the truth, the freaking llama wasn’t even real. It was a stuffed toy. And real llamas don’t sing, or have orange pelts,” seethed Tori Amos (no relation), Davey’s latest interpreter.
The news is sure to confuse fans of Davey’s comments system, who have become involved in an elaborate ruse whereby they take turns pretending to be the stuffed animal, in the hope that he may one day return to Camp Davey.
“Hee hee!” was all Ms Amos had to say, before being taken back inside the Camp Davey compound.
For the second time this week, Wellington was rocked today by a publicity earthquake as news surfaced of compromising photos featuring Davey Dreamnation’s pet llama Scaramouche and the supposed wife of Kiwi pop icon Stung.
According to Auckland-based Internet news site www.suxshooterz.co.nz, the photos, showing Scaramouche and Mouse in the most compromising of positions (including one technically impossible position known as the Photoshop clipper), surfaced only hours after Mouse and Stung returned from their honeymoon in Sao Paolo.
“Well this is just absolute nonsense,” Stung fumed today at reporters gathered outside his Rotorua studio, “so just bugger off, I’ve got an album to record.”
Meanwhile, off the coast of Majorca, Davey Dreamnation laughed at paparazzi circling his fifty foot schooner.
“Ha ha ha! What a complete fool! That Stung is really behind the eight ball. Serves him right for shafting me so severely with that “duets” fraud. All I can say is, he’d better watch his back. There’ll be a few more of these stunts over the next little while, I think you’ll find. Welcome to the information age, Stung.”
Scaramouche, an incorrigible llama in search of his next neenish tart, remains one of DNRC Records’ most successful solo artists.
His entire oeuvre to date consists of this solo masterpiece, a theme song described as “Cher meets the Tin Lids”, plus two home-recorded soundscapes that we hope never to release.
Scaramouche originally became a recording artist in order to share his inner thoughts and meditations with the world.
Sadly, his addiction to quiche lorraine and ham off the bone led him to become extremely obese, and he has since been admitted to the Betty Ford clinic for rehabilitation.
Nevertheless, on this nose-bleeder, the llama’s inner being really does shine through.
The three-day-old llama, who had apparently escaped from the confines of a pair of 3D glasses, contributed explosive and controversial lyrics to what Davey later admitted was “a c-side”.
Nevertheless, this did not stop Dreamnation from re-releasing this ‘c-side’ under his own name on the patchy Themes E.P.
“Well, some people might say I’m just being charitable but the truth is that the little fellow has been through a lot in the last couple of years, and this is my way of saying thanks.”
Or, as Stung says of his favorite animal recording artist: “When Scaramouche sings, your spirit soars . . . “
Listen to the track below, and let us know whether you agree.
Davey Dreamnation was in shock last night after learning of a freak accident involving his pet llama Scaramouche.
While the exact cause and circumstances of the incident may never be known, it is believed that the two day old friend of the embattled entertainer may have been trapped inside a 3D picture viewer, after being photographed at a karaoke booth near Goulburn, New South Wales.
Despite having no visible interpreter or spokesperson present, Dreamnation informed the throng of press photographers assembled outside his rural Snowy River property this morning that Scaramouche is alive and well, if not fully developed.
“Let me assure you that my good friend and travelling companion is in fine spirits.
“In fact, just yesterday I spoke to Scaramouche and I’m promised I’ll see him in the flesh tomorrow using a special pair of 3D glasses. Oh yes, Scaramouche is here to stay. I only wish the poor little bugger knew how amazingly photogenic he is.”