Seething since 2000*
Davey Dreamnation was in shock last night after learning of a freak accident involving his pet llama Scaramouche.
While the exact cause and circumstances of the incident may never be known, it is believed that the two day old friend of the embattled entertainer may have been trapped inside a 3D picture viewer, after being photographed at a karaoke booth near Goulburn, New South Wales.
Despite having no visible interpreter or spokesperson present, Dreamnation informed the throng of press photographers assembled outside his rural Snowy River property this morning that Scaramouche is alive and well, if not fully developed.
“Let me assure you that my good friend and travelling companion is in fine spirits.
“In fact, just yesterday I spoke to Scaramouche and I’m promised I’ll see him in the flesh tomorrow using a special pair of 3D glasses. Oh yes, Scaramouche is here to stay. I only wish the poor little bugger knew how amazingly photogenic he is.”