The Happy Farang

The Happy Farang is the name of a chapbook I wrote and published at the beginning of the 21st century, signalling my entry into the self-publishing hall of fame.

  • hello!—i am so happy to be a farang in your country relieved to discover this word that describes me & pleased to be here spending all my money on trinkets & going to the toilet—hooray! now even my shit is farang! a foreign body yearning to be assimilated! get out of thailand i say to…

  • monk lovers

    she loved me for a matter of seconds but her affair with the monks promises to be a lifelong obsession hey that hurts— right there doc can you lance jab pop it cut it out? look at this it’s a postcard she sent me—monks! you think that’s trivial? wait till you see the photos! monks…

  • timpani crash /tuk-tuk caged verandah /air-con little bells /squid vendor fecund waterway /chao phraya police helmet /city intersection pollution viaduct /sky train hardware section /chinatown pirate tape stand /thanon khao san shining stupa /urban wat

  • the choice of sunglasses is impor-tant but on the maple leaf? ray-bans are out too miami vice … beatle specs no dead giveaway (tint in sunlight) chem-mart? anonymous average ok collared shirt i’d prefer a gaudy hunter s. thompson hawaiian no. but beige is a city colour camouflage same with pants & as for loafers?…

  • it is the year 2542 BE – in bangkok the streets are flooded with people 543 years in advance of the western world but only 7 hours ahead of GMT – in the meantime football grips the nation & entropy invades every available thanon & soi art flourishes in the city moving slowly north towards…

  • Tuk-tuk

    life – cough-cough go-go fast-fast slow-slow break-break flow-flow honk-honk hel-lo where-you go-go tuk-tuk hi-ho same-same no-no thao-rai cheap-cheap silk-silk wat-wat guess-so o-kay go-go gem-shop strip-show no-no go-slow wait-wait oh-ho go-go bang-kok tuk-tuk cough-cough stop-go one-two i-know left-left no-no go-go tuk-tuk cough-cough khao-san face-mask whiz-whiz cough-cough poi-son cough-cough tuk-tuk cough-cough go-go same-same don’t-stop cough-cough car-fume tuk-tuk…

  • given the unenviable task of delivering mail in a cantonese walled city charged with entropy & chaos criss-crossing its aerial corridors conduits they call them linked towers that change positions days how the garbage piles up forming strata to be studied by future archaeologists – he can never decipher the old city’s next move &…