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From the Archives: Last Night Betty Extender

From the Archives: Last Night Betty Extender

 
 
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It seems like a long time ago that I wrote the poem ‘Last Night Betty’, and it seems like an eternity since I listened to this slice of mixed up toe-jam.

Featuring unauthorised guitar licks from ELT, and a drum beat from a nifty little app called the Rapmaster that I’ve not been able to find again.

Strap yourself in and be prepared.

It doesn’t get much loopier than this.

Welkom bij DDNv11: Davey Droomnatie

Goedemorgen, mijne dames en heren. Hoe gaat het met jullie? Alles gaat prima? Goed zo! Wat leuk! Dus … Waar zijn wij? Hoe heet je? Ik ben Davey Droomnatie maar aan de overkant van de wereld word ik ‘Davey Dreamnation’ genoemd. Wie is dit ‘Dreamnation’? Dat zullen wij spoedig te weten komen. Tot zo!

DAVEY DREAMNATION REDUX

999 posts … and counting

It’s hard to believe but this is my 999th post on daveydreamnation.com – a seemingly meaningless milestone if you will; and yet it’s also a chance to reflect, for a nanosecond, on everything that has happened since I first started blogging in 2001/2002. I’ll spare you the trip down memory/amnesia lane that often seems mandatory for such excursions into the nether lands of archiving. This is just a chance for me to put a placeholder here and prepare you for the impending 1,000th post. If anyone has any ideas on what that post should be about, please feel free to leave a comment below. Also, if (like Kat) you believe that Smoke could go on for longer, I’m all ears. One of the reasons I say that is because while we’re almost at 1,000 posts, there’s only been 479 comments. So, if we can get 21 comments on this post, we’re almost at the one comment per two posts parity point. Which is something I’ve been aiming for since, oh well, I don’t know. Today?

Yes, it’s time …

My(sp)ace(face)boo(Lin)k(edin) WTF?

akubra.jpgG’day mates, Davey here again with just a few of my most recent thoughts, right off the top of my Akubra, about social networks, being cool and all that stuff. Because I know that some of you are just a little bit confused about what it all means. So, for your reading pleasure, I’m going to answer, as well as I can, that perennial question, as well as a few others. And while some of you may dismiss my musings as the demented rantings of a cocky with a few too many loose bits of gravel in the top paddock, that doesn’t mean that I’m the only one thinking these things. In fact, from what I can gather, pretty much everyone in Australia with an email account is now facing the ultimate choice: do I become a member of Facebook, and ‘re-connect’ with my long-lost pals, or do I stick with Myspace, and sign up KRudd or The Howard Government (THG) as my “friend”? Do I hear a “WTF”? You bet I do! Strewth.

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Little Lord Damnation

img_5314.JPGGreetings, earthlings. LL Damnation here, with an update on the highly successful guerilla marketing campaign we are currently conducting for DNRC Records. You may not even realise that it’s happening, but that doesn’t mean it is. The idea stemmed from some research we did on the daveydreamnation.com portal and some highly-charged focus groups, which told us that people want more funny stuff on the site. That’s where I come in. I’m a virtual avatar of Davey’s design and Pixel Mouse’s execution. My job is to look like a complete and utter idiot. The results speak for themselves. Totally ridiculous. Marry me!

Davey Dreamnation reveals new look, back in the recording studio

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In a move eerily and uncannily similar to Cyndi Lauper’s “Girls Just Wanna Have Fun”-era wardrobe malfunction decision, Davey Dreamnation has gone imperial and re-invented himself as a member of the aristocracy in the dying days of the reign of Louis XIV. Speaking from the drawing room of his gigantic new manor house, Little Lord Damnation confirmed both his new look and the rumours that have been circulating around Tribesco for the past few days – that he is indeed back in the recording studio, having locked himself in there during a midnight excursion to his royal larder, where he found only a couple of sandwiches and one seriously bloated llama. Speaking from the other side of the gigantic oak-pannelled door separating him from the rest of the world, LL Damnation could be heard to mutter something about “seething” and “freaking Scaramouche” before wandering off to inspect the recording studio’s facilities, which are rumoured to be analog.

101 Friends

Today Davey Dreamnation celebrated an important milestone – the signing up of his one hundred and first Myspace friend. Cynics will, predictably, moan that most of these so-called friends are just placeholder pages for bands both currently active (hello Bloc Party, Love of Diagrams, Sonic Youth, The Fauves, Boards of Canada, The Early Years, Silver Jews, Clint Bo Dean et al) or nostalgically non-existent (goodbye Crow, Sun Ra, Swervedriver, That Petrol Emotion, Chris de Burgh – ooh, hang on a minute).

However, cynics are well known for their lack of a sense of humour. They need to get one fast. Or else, a Myspace page of their own. Sure, there’s people out there who ascribe way too much importance to Myspace (hello everyone) but for the most part, I think most people sign on just to send silly comments to each other and also to perve on otehr peoples’ comments. Then again there are the hardliners, including UK band Wire, whose Myspace page uncompromisingly declares:

It seems like lots of you out there want to be friends with Wire which is very flattering. Your supportive comments are much appreciated! There is a lot of love out there for Wire!!!

Each of the many daily friend requests is in fact checked out because not everyone is who they say they are on MySpace. For that reason we are sorry but we cannot accept friend requests from private profiles. Wire is on MySpace because it is a public space, there is no reason why someone who wants to keep their identity private needs to connect to Wire in this way.

(emphasis mine)

I was initially nervous about submitting a friend request to such a hardcore principled band, not least because at the time my profile proudly wore its Chris de Burgh influence on its sleeve. Nevertheless, I was promptly signed up by Wire anyway, who obviously do not actually check every profile at all. I mean, how else do you end up with over 8000 friends. Just ask Howard Jones. Personally, I’m happy that I’m able to display 24 friends who are all real people.

I also like listening to music and trying to poach other peoples’ friends. That being said, I am aware that Sun Ra is dead, and that were he alive, he probably wouldn’t be into having his own Myspace page. I’m also aware that unlike Wire, most musicians don’t actually have anything to do with their Myspace page. But I ask you: how much does a musician have to do with their website, tour poster, CD packaging or whatever in the real world anyway?

Myspace: the Ultimately Me Space for Those Who I Might Not Want to Come Back to My Place.

Some Alternative Davey Dreamnation Promotional Shots

While I’ve been sweating over the choice of promotional photo for my upcoming debut book of poetry, I’ve also been grappling with issues of artistic integrity and interrogating my own self-image, with alarming results. How do I want the world to view me? Is it possible for me to control the image I present to the world? Does anyone really care?

Cue some spectacular photographic work from my sister Francesca, who obviously has no respect for me and clearly has too much time on her hands. I’ve been looking at these pics for the past few days and laughing so hard it’s giving me a belly ache. If I was Stung, I’d be seething right now. Seething.

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Davey Dreamnation (almost) eats his own head!

Having spent the best part of two weeks figuring out how to transfer content from six blogger pages to this, the new international webportal and virtual headquarters of Davey Dreamnation Enterprises, it came as no surprise today when an unnamed junior technician, midway through eating a bar of turkish delight, inadvertantly hit delete while navigating the FTP interface, with the end result that all [d/dn v.10] services and facilities suffered an immediate “brown-out” whose devastating effect, comparable to a cookie crumb becoming lodged in a ventilation fan on board the International Space Station, was only minutes ago reversed, thanks to the diligence and superior brainpower of Davey Dreamnation himself, who is now considering changing his name to Davey Damnation, in apparent reference to words exchanged between himself and said junior technician, who now finds himself “cooling his jets” somewhere on the perimeter of the Camp Davey compound, along with Mr D’Nation’s insufferable llama Scaramouche, the Kiwi Sting impersonator Stung and various luminaries from the 1980s including Sir Chris de Burgh, Sir Bros, Sir Nik Kershaw, Sir Howard Jones aka Hojo and Sir Tears For Fears, who threatened to eat his own head should such a catastrophe ever befall Davey Dreamnation Enterprises again, a threat interpreted hopefully by those assembled as a promise whose fulfillment all now eagerly look forward to, much as we mere mortals look ahead with delight to the appearance of a comet on the western horizon, itself a symbol of all we have come to love and cherish, in short, home, though faraway on a cold planet, seemingly immune to static.

I Claim Responsibility

I Claim Responsibility

 
 
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The first recording by Davey Dreamnation since the second space shuttle exploded, “I Claim Responsibility” was originally aired as a spoken word piece on ABC Radio National in 2005 as part of the Deep End Poetry Slam.

Never one to rest on his laurels, Davey completely re-recorded the track to cassette and then uploaded the song to his personal computing empire, losing most of the original’s unique sounds and tuning in the process.

Forever destined to undersell his own lyrical genius, Dreamnation manages once again on this track to confound, move and alienate an entire generation, and all in three minutes and forty eight seconds.

Beat that!

Radio Dreamnation

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[dnrc]: The First 50 Releases!

Davey DreamnationIn the tradition of everything barnestorming and brill, [dnrc] has reached a massive milestone, just one day after the completion of the EvilWealth Games: namely, its fiftieth release. In just over a year of operation, [dnrc], the record label set up and made famous by the hard-working, committed and just-a-little-bit-deluded maestro of the signature jarmy, Davey Dreamnation, has earnt a reputation for backing artists who have never been heard of, and then deleting their entire ouevre, to the chagrin of fans and the delight of rarity-obsessed collectors. Hence, releases by The Guide Ponies, The Cruns, Mead and (most recently) Super Grope, which could have garnered a massive listening audience, have instead been consigned to the dustbin marked “sad” and, on the other side, “deleted”. You may never hear these records out loud. However, you can be certain that the massive archiving effort that is the [dnrc] website will one day rival the one currently being set up by Snoogle and the Camp Davey Public Library. Impossibly seething, certainly deluded and caustically non-Romantic, Davey Dreamnation told reporters today that, had it not been for the so-called death of his close friend Stung (a fine Sting impersonator from New Zealand), and the emotional support provided by his muse, Scaramouche the llama, [dnrc] might never have even got off the ground. “That’s right,” the gifted flautist was quoted as saying, “just turn right at Swanston Street, cross the bridge and you’ll see the freaking fish on your left. Have a nice freaking day. Turkeys.”

[d’dn] at number 1 – again

This is getting a bit boring now – but davey dreamnation is sitting pretty at number 1 on the mp3.com.au lo-fi charts, again. Thanks everyone.

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