Seething since 2000*
Davey Dreamnation has emerged from a self-imposed silence to find that nothing has changed, and that he shouldn’t have even bothered coming back.
The confused artist’s bitterness follows a week of “hard slog” at Camp Davey, involving numerous emu parades and rubbish runs, disputes with DNRC over the title of Davey’s debut album and scuffles with a boatload of Australian politicians, who were at one stage attempting to seek asylum at the paradisical resort and holiday camp.
“Messrs Howard, Crean, Downer and Costello were refused entry to Camp Davey and were instead held for interrogation at the Camp Davey Illegal Immigrant Processing Centre, which is basically a hole in the ground half-filled with human and llama excrement,” Dreamnation spokesperson and rumoured live-in Camp entertainer Tori Amos (no relation) announced today.
“They were found not to be genuine refugees and will therefore be sent back to where they came from at the earliest opportunity. This is further evidence that the “Dreamnation Solution” is finally working, and should send a clear message to any other hypocritical, semi-human, so-called political “representatives” that their quaint brand of xenophobia is simply not welcome here, or anywhere else for that matter.
“We also believe that the release later this week of a video containing footage of a recent concert by Davey Dreamnation will act as a further deterrant to any other fuckwits wishing to strap their imbecilic, misleading and mean-spirited “policies” onto the Davey Dreamnation, which as you know is founded on a spirit of tolerance, equality and human rights.”