Seething since 2000*
As far as auspicious dates go, April 7 is right up there. It’s the day on which we celebrate Davey Dreamnation’s creation (he is now three years old), and is also the day on which Russell Crowe came brawling and bawling into the world, forty years ago. To mark the occasion, the film star and musician in his own right contacted Davey by satellite phone, to offer his best wishes and a prayer for world peace. “Yeah, the call came in pretty early, like about 4am, so I don’t know what the time zone situation is in Coffs Harbour. Russ was pretty adamant that he had to speak with Davey,” Scaramouche informed the large crowd gathered outside the Tribesco compound. “Then again, pretty much every local celebrity’s been trying to reach Davey today.” Sources who refused to be referred to by name have confirmed that Crowe recited a list of demands, including that Davey accompany Thirty Odd Foot of Grunt on their forthcoming tour of Micronesia, and an even more alarming demand – that Davey come to Camp Crowe and personally tutor Russ in the fine art of singing. “Yes, I heard that too,” admitted a clearly crestfallen Stung, “and I have to say, Davey’s the man to do it. He’s a remarkable teacher. I mean, he even managed to coach that freaking llama to sing, and if that’s possible, then so is anything. I should know.” Dreamnation has so far refused to comment on Crowe’s list of demands, preferring instead to concentrate on the final track-listing for his incendiary return to form, the Recognition of Prior Learning album, which should be “huge”.